Price

There is always price to pay to get something, it suddenly strikes my nerves when my friend said that in msn.

We all "pay" our time to exchange for the money for living, we "pay" our energy in hanging out with friends, we "pay" our brain cells to obtain the happiness bought by alcohol, we "pay" our love and caring to someone hoping to receive the love and caring from someone. There is no free lunch, it's 2 ways always. Give and take.

If only "give", and no one "take", it's a waste to "give", same on the other way round. Let's talk about friendship, if you dun "pay" afford on maintaining the relationship, it will fade away gradually, that's what I think, it's not necessary to meet always, but a constant update is needed, a letter, an email, a sms, msn or icq.

Everything is like investment, like farming, if you want to harvest, work hard and work hard. Yes, there is always price to pay to get something.

Good news

Tonight, I finally feel I am back... have lost for quite a while, White Stag with Shaun and Charlie tonight, I felt absolutly great and relieve, i didn't need to think much, I felt great and totally feeing my existance, that's what one should feel when hanging out with friends. I lost this feeling for ages to be honest, as mentioned in my blog before, I was absolutely out of my mind and felt falter whenever I went out with my friends.

I am happy not cos of the alcohol, but I feel something that I didn't feel for long long time, the feeling that I should have, once I had. Thanks God that it's back. I was thinking to ask question, but I don't need now, I know the answer already, yes, I know it. So good.

Tonight is also my ex-boss birthday party, I admire her and respect her so much. I treasure her advise and she's always good to me, always my BEST advisor, whenever I need to make BIG decision, I consult her, and she always give me her BIGGEST support, always. She's so great that I don;t know what to say. I don't admre or respect one that much, but she deserves and worths to have my respect. I hope her the best in every way, always.

All of you, rememeber, everything will wrk out fine, no matter how hard it is, with your freinds, nothing is impossible, and you will never be defected. Hold your faith and fight for whatever you want.

Turning Point

Seem after steping into my 26th, there are quite a lot of things happened. And a lot of decision have been made, many are those I have never thought about, or I didn't care about. Here are the some,

1) Get rid of those bloody credit cards' debt. (I didn't really give a shit on that for years, but these days, I decided to make a move and sort that out, seem it's something good for me, not steping into those fxxking trap ever again)

2) Drink less (boozing for years and it's time to lessen the amount, as I found it did affect me alot, both physically and mentally)

3) Weight control (Been talking about it for ages, after stop practising JUDO, my weight keeps on going up, more than 8 kg comparing with 3 years ago, yes, time to give some control on that, dun wanna become a fxxking FAT bastard before 30)

4) Get a gf again, haven't got a serious one for ages, but I think it's time to get one, as I wanna get married asap.

5) Less talk, sounded I had too much bullshit before, time to change.

6) Money, yes, very cruical issue in my life. Trying to get as much as I can is my goal. No worry, I will still spend alot in drinking, clubbing and shopping.

Seem I think alot more these days, having more plans, setting more goals. Not giving pressure to myself, but just wanna achieve what I want in shorter time and you know, I am kinda materialistic, just wanna feed up myself with everything I want. Haha.

26 is a mark and maybe a year which worths to memorize.

True love is more than a sexual relationship

Hey guys, it's a bit out-fashioned, I wrote it when I was studying in Year 2, kind of philosophy stuff. I found it quite ineresting as what I wrote was not really what I think... but anyhow, that's something interesting to share with your guys.

True love is more than a sexual relationship. What is love in general? It involves maternal love, fraternal love, friendship, romantic love, etc. In general, true love here refers to romantic love. According to the Oxford Advanced Learner’s Dictionary, the word “true” means genuine, rightly called what one it is called. So true love is different from love. Love is a boarder term, it involves and includes many things. According to Zick Rubin, he argues that romantic love includes three elements, they are 1) attachment, 2) caring and 3) intimacy. In addition, Robert Sternberg argues that romantic love is composed of intimacy and passion. He views love into 3 different elements, i.e. intimacy (liking), passion (infatuation) and commitment (empty love). Is sex necessary for romantic love? By referring to D.H. Lawrence, “Love without sex and sex without love are sinful”. On the other hand, Plato holds the belief that love is spiritual, without any physical sexual intercourse and without obligation. Nowadays, it is a bias topic whether true love is equivalent to sex and whether love is one of the elements of true love. Here is going to discuss the relationship between true love and sex. And what is true love and sexual relationship.

First of all, what is Platonic love? It was stated that love here refers to “pure beauty” and not affected by any external or internal factors. According to what Plato stated, love was established between same genders, and as Plato was male, the love he stated was between male and male. And derived from his study, the relationship between male and female was purely sex only, and had nothing in between, and so there was no love. The love stated by Plato concerned more about spirit and was very sensible with no sexual relationship in between.

Nowadays, in general speaking, true love is composed of pure love and sexual relationship. Moreover, love can be defined as a party giving out his/her concern and love without return; devoting one’s best to protect the beloved one without obligation. Is sexual desire necessary for romantic love? Or is actual sexual relationship necessary for romantic love? Basically, sex is natural and is human basic instinct, everyone has his/her need, no one can ignore. Furthermore, sexual intercourse is a process of reproduction and given by God, what is wrong if one has sexual intercourse with another? Not having sexual relationship means true love? Can purely sexual relationship substitute true love? What are the components of true love?

Love is very complex, it involves physical and mental feelings. Love brings happiness, warm hearted feeling. More obviously, nowadays lovers will hand in hand when they are in love, it is a kind of communication and identification. As love is a kind of happiness sometimes, it involves all the things that can bring happiness, sexual relationship is only one of the ways to bring happiness. So sexual relationship cannot be ignored. But besides sexual relationship, many things should be added, e.g., the communication between lovers, the concern, the awareness, etc. If true love is equivalent to sexual relationship only, then there is no different between prostitution and true love. Is one night stand true love? Generally speaking, getting one night stand is searching for physical happiness, not involving any mental communication. True love involves pure love and concern, etc, so a pure search of physical happiness, i.e. sexual intercourse is not true love. Is there true love between prostitutes and their customers? It had better say it is an exchange of benefits with each others. It involves obligation, offer and acceptance, it is a transaction between money and sexual intercourse. If there is only sex and no love, it is simply a satisfaction in physical state but not spiritual state, there is no different between animal’s mating for reproduction.

And if true love is equivalent to sexual relationship, then can a sexually disable guy receive true love? If it is true, then sexually disability will lead to the absent of true love. Is that true? It is no doubt that one with sexual disability can also receive true love, then what involve in true love? Respect? Love? Can Platonic Love applied here? Partially can be applied, spiritual communication, pure love and love not affected by other factors. So sexually relationship is one of the elements in true love, but not all. Love is very different from true love, love is based on sex, but true love is based on sex, pure love and other elements.

What if there are no respect and concern in true love? What will it be? If making love with lover without respect and concern, it is merely a mating process or critically, it is raping rather than making love. Sexual relationship is a bridge of communication and shares of happiness and the way to higher the relationship between lover. Bringing them into another stage of love. In view of some religions, premarital sexual relationship is prohibited, then can true love exist before marriage? If there is true love, what link the lovers together? Merely, trust, frank and care are the components.

The case of the young man’s admiration and respect of an ugly old woman without sexual desires: does he fall in love with the old woman? This case is similar to the case of one who bares sexual disability. True love really not only involves sexual relationship, the admiration on one’s strength can also be a part of true love. The stage of sexual relationship and true love is very different, sexual relationship is the stage of physical need, while that of true love is spiritual stage. The 2 stages cannot be compared. According to Marslow, there are 5 stages of human’s need, the lowest is physical need, the highest is spiritual need. Sexually relationship and true love lie in extreme stages, so it is not appropriate to put an equal sign between them. There are still 3 stages in between, they are biological stage, biological logic stage, biological cultural stage. So these 3 stages need to be added so to achieve true love.

True love is more than a sexual relationship. True love involves care, frank, trust, sacrifice, concern, respect, etc, sexually relationship is just one of the components of true love. In order to establish a concrete true love, many other factors need to be concerned rather than sex. True love is not only equal to sexual relationship.

校園錄

Fews days ago, found this in my computer, wrote it when I was in Year 1 or 2. It's about my feeling and memory towards about my secondary school, it's a very good memory. It's such a special place, so many memories, so much good time... unforgetable, and so unbelievable.

Not going to translate, dun wanna lose the originality.

Enjoy!

" 莊嚴的綠校徽，耀眼的白襯衣，沉實的灰褲子，別緻的綠白呔，出眾的藍絨襤，這是足足陪伴了我七年的校服，深幽的校舍，永不能忘的校訓----溫良剛毅，七個寒暑都是生活在這個溫馨的家。

第一選擇，可能是人生第一個重要的決擇，令我進入一所我所希冀的校院。開心傷心的事數之不盡，得到失去的亦難以盡錄。猶記得首日跨過校園門檻時，六神無主，不知所措，當日的情景仍歷歷在目，記憶猶新。中一的生活著實平凡普通，起床上學，放學回家，日日如是，相信跟一般中一學生無異。直至中二下學期的某一天，期待己久的轉變終於到臨。

耳邊忽然傳來一陣天籟之音，一字一音扣人心弦。萬料不到這在我餘下五年多的中學生涯起了強烈的化學作用，精彩燦爛的中學日子終於來臨，載歌載舞的生活終於揭幕。所有的事都值得緬懷，成績，朋友，校園都豐盛了我那了無生氣的生活。

『來來回回仍念記，從前塵陪著你……』掌聲歡呼聲綿綿不斷。站在台上唱歌原是那麼美妙令人快慰的事。就此，在中三我終於獻出了我的第一次，第一次參加校內的歌唱比賽，第一次在歌唱比賽中獲獎，猶如被捧至天上。有喜必有悲，驕傲自大的我終於初嘗測驗的失敗。別人的嘲笑，冷眼旁觀令我陷入無底的幽谷。那次的敗陣令我知道誰是朋友，令我學會如何克困難，令我學會如何裝備自己，真要感謝上天給我如此的經驗。

在走廊中唱歌跳舞，在課室內高談闊論，己成為我中四中五標記。中四中五的一切切絕對是改變了往後的生活。決擇的時候又再來臨，『文定理?理定文?』不斷徘徊在我腦海。自知數理不通的我，竟然愚蠢盲目的選擇理科，埋下令自己後悔四年的伏線，紅色一次比一次沉重，可是人卻越來越懶散，不斷的吃喝玩樂，令我中四的成績較以往遜色很多。雖然仍能保持一定的水準，但其實自己已對自己有諸多不滿，不過整個中四仍是渾渾噩噩的渡過。之後的一年，各人都被一股無形的壓力所以抑壓著，難以舒一口氣，我亦不能幸免。中四的『荒淫無道』，終於要付上沉重的代價。日以繼夜的學習，不眠不休的溫習，令我憔悴不堪。幸而得到身邊戰友不斷的鼓勵，日子才不致那麼難過。中五整日都只是不斷征戰，校園的模樣已開始變得模糊，這個家己沒以往般溫暖。

中五的征戰成功，令我順利再次『回家』。高中的生活令人難以忘懷，猶記得競選社長，猶記得再次踏入運動場，猶記得再次在課堂高呼大叫，載歌載舞，歌聲滿天飛。很多黑火柴頭般的頭頓變紅柴頭，黃柴頭，啡柴頭等等，色彩斑斕 , 令人目不暇給。吃喝玩樂的朋友隨風而去，換來是幾個誠摯的朋友。中六忙於參予校內活動，玩至全校無人不識，無人不懂，完全滿足了我的虛榮。出風頭，嘩眾取寵令我及其餘幾住同學成為所謂的『風頭躉』。由於長期流連校園，令人跟校舍的感情增進不少，一草一木，一卒一兵都瞭如指掌，家的感覺又再回來。

一覺醒來，昔日溫暖的校園己離我而去，換來是一所紅磚院校，讓我繼續延展我精彩的人生，七年苦讀令我學會如何獨立自處。太陽昇起，夜幕低垂，七年的中學生涯，教人回味。"

Happy, Unhappy

Finally, the war ended, as some of you may know or some have already heard the update in the industry. To be honest, I am not happy with the result, no dout, the victory belongs to my side, but so what. I feel a bit bad, not cos I have mercy on my enemy, I think we should have a royal fight, I hate to win cos someone surrenders.

I am not sure whether I am happy or not, I only know I am not happy all the time, not cos of the job, but for some reasons, I don't know that's the problem, I am not that happy that before. 2 years or 3 years ago, I am not like that, but now, I kinda lose my energy, I am tired, so tired of talking, laughing, where's the smiling face? Or I get used not to feel happy or I am always like that, maybe I pretended I was happy before. I don't even wanna talk, I am not sure.

Maybe there are a lot of things bothering me these days, somehow it's quite hard to find the ways out, seem I amlosing my friends in some ways. Every time when I come out, I can't stop thinking, thinking whether I was used to be like that, what should i do to be the Ming before, are my friends tried of listening to me, keep on thinking what did I talk to my friends 2 or 3 years ago? Maybe I worry too much, I am not sure.

Anyways, the war is now ended, can enjoy the peaceful moment for a while hopefully. Exhausted, both physically and mentally, maybe that's the price of being an adult. Adult, a term that I always dreamt of when I was young, but now, it's such a horrible and terrifying word to me, no point of return. Let go? Somehow that's no easy, talking is always easy, but when you really need to do that, seem there are tons of weight on the shoulder. Maybe that's what we called "Pressure"...

Support or stay away, your choice.

Let go

"Let go", that's what we always need to learn and do always. Some people may say "Let go" is kind of escape, no doubt, it's kind of escape, it's just like putting something on the island or in the dessert and will never get back. We all need to be realistic, when something has changed or is chaged, no matter what, you can never rewind and get the same thing again.

When time flies, people change, that's the universal fact. Your appearance changed, your attitude changed, your viewpoint changed, just like we can't stay young forever. No one can do that so far. Even your look never change, there are always changes in your thinking, your attitude or what so ever. When you get old, what can you do, you can only try your best to slow down the aging, but you can't rewind the clock and get back to 18. So let go. I will say, you need to let go when you can't do anythimg on that. To be honest, no matter how hard you try, it will never be the same again.

So, learn how to "let go" is somehow the best way to deal with something that you can't control. Remember, most of the things are not controlled in your hands solely. Not to be negative or pessimistic, but look around...

Pirate?

Can you believe that is still pirate in such a civilised world? I doubt how they work, as there are satellites, radar, and all kind of stuff that can trace everything. The technology is so dedicated that even if you are showing in the bathroom, they can give 100% clear audio-visual images. So, how do those pirate work?

Why can't the ship / boat just turn away and put up the full speed and run away? Or they can simply report there is pirate and the satellites can trace, even they get robbed, question mark and question mark in my mind.

It's so cool to be pirate, treasure, women, alcohol, and the best is, DON"T NEED TO WORK HARD.

Good tired and Bad tired

They are new terms to me. I have never heard of that before dinner last night. And my friend gave a very clear definition between them. In here, I will try to further elaborate.

Ok, "Good", according to the Oxford's Advanced Dictionary, it means "of high quality", "pleasant", "able to perform satisfactorily", "competent", etc; while "Bad" means "of poor quality", "faulty", "below an acceptable standard" and etc.

"tired" = feeling that one would like to sleep or rest.

Sound quite academic in some ways, but good tired and bad tired are easy to distinguish. And I shall give you examples later to let you have a better understanding on these.

Good tired, according to what my friend said last night, something enjoyable, memorable happened the day or night before, even tho you are tired on the next day, it still worth.
Bad tired, he hasn't mentioned anything about that, but by referring to what he defined good, bad should be something meaningless, not enjoyable and something shitty happened and resulted in tiredness.

Below are some examples of good and bad tired.

1) Working in office til 3am (For most people, it should be bad tired, who doesn't wanna go home and sleep?)

2) Drinking til 4am and having hangover on the next day (In this case, it depends, it depends on your intention when you decided to go drinking, if you intended to get drink and have fun, that's good tired, if not, that's bad)

3) Having sex til 6am in the morning (should be good tired, according to what my friend said)

4) Insomnia (no doubt, bad tired)

5) Watching tv til 2 (bad tired, you just don't wanna sleep, waste of time)

6) Sleeping for 12 hours and still tired (bad tired, and you will just feel tired for the rest of the whole day)

A bit tired now, surely I am having bad tired these days...

"Pickafight" Phenomenon

"Pickafight" starts to float on the surface in my mind tonight, I am talking about the phenomenon, not the person, I am sure only few of you know what I am talking about, long story behind this phenomenon, hard to explain and talk in here. But I have got a feeling… Suddenly I don't want to talk about that. Let go…